Potty training is a big milestone for little ones, and for their grown-ups too. It can feel daunting, but with patience, a positive approach and a good dose of humour, most children get there in their own time.
Our Busy Bees team has supported many children through potty training, so we’ve gathered our best tips to help you get started. We’ll cover how to tell if your child is ready, what to prepare, how to handle accidents and how we can work together to keep things consistent between home and nursery.
Is your child ready?
There’s no perfect age to start. Many children show signs of readiness somewhere between 18 months and 3 years, but every child is different. Readiness matters far more than age. Look out for signs like these:
- They stay dry for an hour or two at a time, or wake up dry from a nap.
- They know when they’re weeing or pooing, and may tell you, hide or go quiet.
- They pull at a wet or dirty nappy, or ask to be changed.
- They show interest in the toilet, or in copying older children and grown-ups.
- They can follow simple instructions, such as “sit down” or “wash your hands”.
- They can pull their trousers up and down with a little help.
If your child isn’t showing many of these signs yet, it’s fine to wait a few weeks and try again. Starting before they’re ready often makes the process take longer.
Getting prepared
A little groundwork makes a big difference:
- Talk about it. Read potty-themed picture books together, and let your child see family members using the toilet.
- Choose your kit. Decide whether to start with a potty, a toddler toilet seat with a step, or both. Letting your child pick their own potty or pants can get them excited.
- Dress for success. Clothes that are easy to pull down, such as joggers and leggings, are much better than dungarees, tights or fiddly buttons.
- Pick your moment. Choose a calm period with no big changes, such as moving house, a new baby or a holiday. A long weekend at home is a great time to start.
- Stock up. Have plenty of spare pants, clothes, wipes and a bag for wet things.
Top tips from our Busy Bees team
- Go straight to pants in the daytime. Many children learn faster in pants than pull-ups, because they can feel when they’re wet. You might still choose a nappy for naps and night-time.
- Offer the potty regularly. Suggest a sit every 20 to 30 minutes at first, and always after meals, drinks and waking up. Gently invite them, “Let’s try the potty”, rather than asking, “Do you need a wee?”, which often gets a “no”.
- Keep drinks flowing. Plenty of water gives your child lots of chances to practise and helps prevent constipation.
- Praise the effort, not just the result. Celebrate sitting on the potty, telling you they need to go and washing their hands. A sticker chart or a happy dance can work wonders.
- Stay calm about accidents. Accidents are part of learning. Keep your voice relaxed and say something simple like, “Oops, wee goes in the potty. Let’s get you changed.” Never tell your child off or show disappointment.
- Make it a routine. Build potty trips into everyday moments, such as before going out, before stories and before bed.
- Teach good hygiene from day one. Make handwashing part of every potty trip. Singing a song while they wash helps them do it properly.
- Be patient with poos. Some children find pooing on the potty harder. Keep things relaxed, offer a sit after meals and give them a book to look at.
- Don’t be afraid to pause. If your child is upset, resisting or having lots of accidents after a couple of weeks, take a short break. Coming back in a few weeks is not a failure.
Working together with nursery
Consistency between home and nursery is key. When you’re ready to start, let your child’s key person know, and we’ll follow the same approach and use the same words you use at home.
We’ll:
- offer the potty or toilet at regular times throughout the day
- celebrate every success, big and small
- deal with accidents calmly and kindly
- keep you updated each day on how it’s going
Please send in plenty of spare pants, socks, trousers and a spare pair of shoes, all clearly labelled. Accidents are completely normal in the first few weeks, and we’re always happy to help.
Frequently asked questions
How long does potty training take? It varies. Some children grasp it within a week or two, while others take a few months. Most will still have the odd accident for a while afterwards, especially when they’re tired, unwell or absorbed in play.
Should I use pull-ups or pants? For daytime, many families find pants work best, because children can feel when they’re wet. Pull-ups can be handy for long journeys, naps or night-time.
When will my child be dry at night? Night-time dryness usually comes later than daytime dryness, often by months or even years. It depends partly on physical development, so it can’t be rushed. Keep using a nappy or pull-up at night until your child is regularly waking up dry.
My child was doing well but has started having accidents again. Why? Setbacks are common. They’re often linked to illness, tiredness, a change in routine or a big life event such as a new sibling. Stay calm, go back to regular reminders and offer extra praise. It usually passes.
My child refuses to sit on the potty. What should I do? Don’t force it. Try making it fun with a book or song, letting them choose where the potty goes, or switching to a toilet seat. If they’re still resisting, take a break and try again in a few weeks.
Should I start potty training before my child moves rooms or starts school? It’s best to start when your child shows signs of readiness, rather than to meet a deadline. Talk to your key person, and we’ll help you plan the right time together.
When should I speak to a health professional? If your child is often constipated, finds pooing painful, or you have concerns about their progress, speak to your health visitor or GP.
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About the author
Claire Fox-Tristram is the Director of Kiddiwinks Day Nursery and has more than 25 years of experience in the early years sector. Throughout her career, she has supported hundreds of families through every stage of their child’s early years, from settling in as babies to getting ready for school. Claire is passionate about giving every child a happy, nurturing start and helping parents feel confident and well informed.
